Sunday, September 4, 2016
My New Normal Day 15. Bad Day to Good Evening.
Today turned into one of those days that makes you want to just curl up in bed for the day. I started out strong going to get some breakfast and just kind of looking around the area. Still trying to get to know the town. However, Orlando is so huge I really don't think that is possible!
Then I got into what I suppose could be called a text message fight. Something that just dragged me down. Something I don't know entirely how to deal with. I went home, curled up in bed, and called my parents. Fortunately my mom and dad were able to help pull me out of my funk. Enough so that I was able to pull myself together this evening and go to church.
For so long church has been the place I've gone to to calm down and deal with things. I'm Catholic, although for the past few months I've not been a very good one. I've been feeling myself fall away and I think that has contributed to me having more bad days like today.
One of the things I love about my faith is something called Eucharistic adoration. Where you can go in to a little chapel and have some face-to-face time with God. I haven't had that since the beginning of April and I'm feeling the lack of it. The church I went to back in Kalamazoo had a small adoration chapel. I often find myself there when I was having emotionally difficult days like today. It's hard not having one of them around me anymore. But I still have church. I still have mass. And tonight I sat in the church and opened my eyes. I saw that I didn't like a lot of the things that I have been doing. I saw that I have been pulling away from my faith and I realized that this was quite possibly why today has been so bad.
I saw I was pulling away from my faith and constantly finding fault in the churches around me as an excuse. And the more I did that the more bad days I started to have. I use to always lean on my faith for strength and guidance and it's never let me down. Some time along the way I stopped doing that. Tonight though, I started to slowly lean back on that faith and I felt a giant weight start to lift off my heart. It isn't totally gone yet but my day went from bad to good in the one hour I spent in church. I've never been a praise and worship music kind of person but tonight, every line of every praise and worship song sung seemed to be speaking directly to me.
So thank you Lord for helping me turn an emotionally draining and stress filled day into a good night!