Friday, September 2, 2016
My New Normal Day 13. Keep on Crying!
I have had a lot of goals lately! From finishing my program and getting my diploma and my certification and started a new job and moving halfway across the country, life has been pretty full!
Then today I got a phone call from my mom. She let me know I got something from Western Michigan University. It was my actual, physical diploma. She started to read everything that was written on it and all I could do was sit at my desk at work and cry! Even as I write this tonight I'm starting to cry just thinking about it!
I tend to blame the unbalanced hormones inside of me for all of the tears, but the truth is crying is good for you! I held in so many tears in my life especially, when I was sick. I always wanted to be strong for the people around me my whole life! But I have learned that crying doesn't mean you're weak! Crying is your body's way of releasing everything built up inside of you. And sometimes once I start crying its incredibly hard to stop!
I remember one night last November begging my boyfriend over the phone to help me stop crying because I was hurting so much from losing a friend to cancer! I wanted him to make me laugh so I could shove those tears and that hurt deep down. And he told me to just cry and let it all out. That sometimes you have to cry it out, you can't hold it in all the time. He was right. As much as it hurt, I needed to let myself cry for my friend and myself and for everyone dealing with this disease.
And crying doesn't have to be sad! I texted my younger brother telling him that I couldn't stop crying when I got the picture of my diploma today. He just replied that it was because I was happy! It wasn't the unbalanced, synthetic hormones, it was me just being truly, deeply, unbelievably happy to see a physical manifestation of all my hard work! One piece of paper that stood for so much to me! Three years ago when I got my Bachelors diploma in the mail it was waiting for me the day I got home after my hysterectomy. This time, I don't have cancer, I'm not jumping from surgery to chemo. This time my diploma came and I'm on the other side of the country starting a new career! These are definitely tears of happiness!!
So keep on crying. Don't hold it in. Let it out! Tears of sadness or tears of happiness, just let them out!