In the Air!

In the Air!
400 feet above the ground in Orlando.

Florida

Florida
Taking my first step towards a new life.

Virginia

Virginia
Spending an afternoon at Marymount during my internship!

My rocks!

My rocks!
Wouldn't be where I am without my parents!

Graduation

Graduation
Walking for my Masters. An interesting book end as this all started when I graduated from undergrad!

Awesome Nurses!

Awesome Nurses!
After my port removal and saying goodbye to my chemo nurses before moving away from Michigan. Wouldn't be doing that without them!

Hair again!

Hair again!
Growing longer each day

Last Chemo

Last Chemo

Google+ Followers

Silliness

Silliness
Something to remember and return to. A good day!

Follow by Email

Saturday, April 9, 2016

365 Things to Smile About Day 245. Post Port Removal Workout!

I have really struggled with having my port taken out.  It was absolutely the right thing to do.  It was time and also necessary.  But it has also scared me a lot.  My port was like my security blanket.  If I kept it in, my cancer wouldn't come back.  Irrational, maybe, but there it is.

Last night before I fell asleep I realized I have really been slacking off on walking and doing my small, daily workout routine.  I told myself I had no reason to be slacking at all anymore since I no longer had to worry about tugging on my port with different weights and machines.  I decided that I would get back into the gym first thing in the morning.

Well, Saturday being Saturday I admit I slept in!  But right after breakfast I got dressed and headed out, intending to only do my hand hour on the treadmill.  I do like seeing the steps on my pedometer app go up!  As I was walking I found myself continuously reaching up and touching where my port had been and looking at all the machines that had been taboo for over two years.  I'll admit, I was scared of trying them.  There was no medical reason why I couldn't but lets face it, a lot of times fear is difficult to explain.

So I just kinda wandered over to that side of the room after my walk time (which I was able to put a few short, gentle sprints into without falling down!).  I literally stalled by getting on the machine where you put your feet up on a "wall" in front of you pushed it to straiten your legs.  I did several reps on that before I could bring myself to go to the other machines.  But I finally made it over there, set my weights to I think 10 lbs (it's been a while) and did the forbidden push ups that I had been told in no uncertain terms I was NOT allowed to do with a port in!  Nothing feels worse and freaks you out more than to feel your port tugged!!  But this time there was no tugging!!!  LOL!  And so I moved on to another machine I haven't touched in a while and worked on that too!!.

In the end I managed to get a good, FULL, upper body workout!!  First time in almost 3 years!!  It felt pretty great!!!!  So once more, working on one fear at a time and slowly moving past them!!!

No comments: