365 Things to Smile About Day 206. Feeling Real a Little More!

Today I talked with my supervisor for my internship for the first time!!  It was just a short conversation. Hopefully I will meet up with him in Richmond on the weekend and then pepper him with questions!  I am working on finding a place to live down there and trying to get my start dates set and know what I have to do once I get there!  Lets not even mention how I am going to get down there!  While I can drive a lot more than I use to...a long trip to Southern Virginia is more than I can do on my own!  Lol!  But...today I talked to my supervisor.  And that adds a little more realness to it all!  Lol!

365 Things to Smile About Day 205. Many Blessings

Lately I have been working on trying to find a place to live for my internship that I can afford.  I have actually been getting pretty stressed out looking!  It's kinda crazy what some people will charge for a room!  At any rate, I was taking a walk today through the park down town and thinking about how I am going to afford this and that and budgeting in my head.  I've been getting out walking the past couple days because the weather has been behaving and even got a little warmer.  In the past two days I have had four people ask me for money in the park.  I don't carry money with me when I walk and told them and the first three (all older men) said that was ok, wished me a good day and moved on.  I need to start learning the locations of soup kitchens so I at least can direct them in that direction.

Then this afternoon, I was stopped by a young woman who asked me for money because she was hungry and pregnant and had missed dinner somewhere.  I told her I was sorry and I didn't carry cash. As soon as I said that a very angry look came over her face and she looked away saying "Fine" in a manner that was obviously anything but.  I walked on, feeling bad for her and wishing there was something I could do for her and the other people who had asked me for money.  Then I started thinking about the things that had been on my mind that were money related and I had a very strong reality check.  I have a roof over my head and I know I will find one for my internship.  I have a warm bed, clean clothes and food in my refrigerator.  I have close family and friends and would never find myself in the park asking a stranger for money.  I may not have a lot of extras, I might have to watch how I spend and budget.  But I am actually really well off when you think about it.

In that moment I couldn't do anything but thank God for all the blessings He has given me.  Yeah, my apartment isn't pretty or big or flashy.  But it is warm and clean and comfortable and I'm not going from month to month wondering where I will get the rent money.  Yes, I have a strict food budget...but I at least have a budget to be strict with.  My clothes are not designer labels but they are nice and clean.  So I really do have so many wonderful blessings in my life.  I am certainly going to remember this when I am bummed because I can't afford to go out to eat or visit someone or buy something I want.  I have been given many blessings and I have a lot to be thankful for!

365 Things to Smile About Days 203 & 204. A Beautiful Walk!

Yesterday and today have been busy days but it was so nice to go out this afternoon for a walk!  It was still chilly but sunny!  Stress has been building so it was nice to just walk it off with the sun shining and listening to music!!  I know this is short and sweet but sometimes it is just enjoying the simple, little things without looking too deeply into them!  Lol!

365 Things to Smile About Day 202. Anne of Green Gables!

Ever since I was a little girl I have been in love with the world that L.M. Montgomery has made in her books about Anne and Emily and her many short stories!  It doesn't matter how old you get, these are classic, timeless stories that can be read over and over again!  Yesterday I started watching the Anne of Green Gables movies and tonight I finished them!  I just curled up on the couch and lost myself in that world and pushed everything else on my mind and in my life aside for a few hours!  And it was wonderful!

Now I want to go find the book Anne's House of Dreams on Kindle and snuggle down into bed and read myself to sleep!  The stories and characters created in these books have always come alive to me and it is wonderful that after all these years, they are still a source of comfort and complete delight!  Tonight I feel completely happy and content and ready to loose myself in Anne's world!

Tonight has also made me think of my bucket list!  Going to Prince Edward Island is very much near the top of my list and I am thinking that in a year, I am going to plan a trip there!  Once I get settled down and save up a little, I am going to start doing some exploring and P.E.I. will be my first stop!!  Maybe I'll even get some of my own writing done there!  After all, it is a place that has such scope for the imagination!

365 Things to Smile About Day 201. New Glasses!

I am a little excited tonight!  I got my new glasses!  I will admit the prescription is a bit stronger and took me a few minutes to blink away the "Oh!!" feeling when I put them on!  But I really love the way the frames look!!!!  Makes me feel a little cuter and more confident!  And happy to get read of the glasses that looked like they belonged in the '60's or '70's!  My new ones are a pretty blue with just a little bling on the sides!  Loving them!!

365 Things to Smile About Day 200. A Needed Compliment!

One of the things that bothered me when my hair grew back in was that it wasn't the same shade.  I know...big deal!  It came back in!  That was what I was praying for every day since it started to fall out!  I know this sounds silly and more than a bit vain but I loved my original hair.  It was a perfect gold color.  My mom use to hold it next to her gold wedding ring to show the comparison of the two colors and I kinda loved that.  It was fine, thick, gold hair!

I was so afraid when I was bald of my hair coming back in differently.  You hear all these stories of people's hair growing back in completely different colors and textures and thickness.  And I loved my original hair color and wanted it back.  But I think, more importantly, I wanted something to go back to normal.  Something to be the same that it was before because so much was never going to be the same.  And my hair came back in blonde...but a darker blond with more red in it.  As it is getting longer it is lightening up more but to my eyes (and many other eyes) I am a strawberry blonde now...with darker tones.  I'm so thrilled my hair is still fine and thick and growing nice and long and I'm learning to like the shade but it isn't the same.  It isn't gold anymore.  It changed like everything else.

Then today, I was at a pharmacy waiting in line to drop off a prescription and the man in front of me kept turning around and staring at me.  At first I was a little uncomfortable.  Finally he asked me if I had anything in my hair.  I said no and he looked at my hair again and then just stared at it and said that it looked shiny.  Then he said it looked shiny and gold!  Which of course prompted the question of wether it was my natural color.  As crazy as it sounds, in that moment I felt like a huge weight was lifted off my heart!  Someone thought my hair was gold!  Lol!  I thanked him for his compliment and assured him it was my natural hair color.  He kept looking at my hair for a little longer repeating it looked really gold.  It did become a little uncomfortable after a bit and I was glad when he turned his attention to something else but I was also still really thrilled!!  My hair is FINALLY becoming gold again!!!  It's finally getting back to it's normal color.  Wether anyone else sees it or not...at least one person saw it and gave me the compliment I needed to not let this small, seemingly insignificant thing bother me so much anymore!

So thank you to the man at the pharmacy who unknowingly told me that at least one thing, no matter how small, is finally coming back to how it was before cancer and chemo.  Maybe it won't be the exact shade again...but close enough that it looks gold again!   Thank you!!

365 Things to Smile About Day 199. A New Light!

My kitchen light has slowly been getting dimmer and dimmer. The bulbs loosing their brightness. It made me think of a story my dad made up when I was little called The Bright Light story where badness made the lights dim and goodness made them bright. I must have been good because the new bulb that was put in today was crazy bright!  Lol!!!  It's nice to be able to see in my kitchen again!